Thursday, July 26, 2012

The High Tide of Morality?

All this talk about Chik-fil-A is getting me riled up, so we have another rant in store today.

Let me start out by saying, their statement is in no way an affront to homosexual couples.  Personally, I am happy to see a company who doesn't hide behind the popular thought of the day.  I agree with them, it does not mean I hate homosexuals.  It means I believe marriage should only be between a man and a woman.  I also believe that homosexual couples should at least have the same perks of marriage if not marriage.  Power of attorney, being a medical proxy, filing taxes.  That's fair and if we're not going to give them those rights through a civil union, I believe they should get them in some form.

That being said, all of you on the "equality" side seem to think you're all the "moral authority".  But the fact of the matter is you judge us because we don't share your opinion.  I'm pretty sure the first amendment protects our ability to speak our minds.  If you think we're closed-minded, show us how to be open-minded.  If you think we're judgmental, stop judging us.  You are the moral authority aren't you?  Secondly, the ability for homosexuals to get married will end the same way heterosexual marriage ends.  At some point, they won't want it anymore either, the divorce rate will be above 50% for them too, and kids will always be destroyed by that.  So what are we really fighting so hard for anyway?  Things will always get progressively worse as time goes by if we don't avoid the pitfalls that we seem to jump into.

Now, every generation in the history of history has had this problem.  I think it can be best illustrated by discussing the hippy generation.  But, please remember, this is not an affront to the hippy generation.  The hippies were looked down upon because of their radical ideas for peace.  Now the idea doesn't seem so crazy but it was not popular outside of hippy culture.  They grew their hair out, they staged demonstrations, and they generally had all kinds of detached sex.  To the previous generation, they seemed like the scourge of the country.  Now look at us.  How much has changed?

We still decry the war we just had, even though it accomplished it's purpose and had much support at the start, we still have all kinds of detached and meaningless sex with people we don't know or only know for a short time, and the hair, well, the hair is a small issue these days.  We still scream for equality, this time for a different demographic, and don't do the work to earn it.  So at the very least, the only things that have changed are the hot button issue of the day, and the ones who carry the prevalent opinion.  And with everything that's going on these days, the rising crime rates, the rising divorce rates, the rising number of people who don't believe in God, and our give-nothing-but-take-all mindsets, I wouldn't be able to say that we are at the high tide of morality these days.  Would you?

Let me ask you, if you are all about equality and not judging people, then why do you instantly judge Christians?  Because you generalize them, just like you've been generalized.  So if you really want equality, we're all generalizing each other and that sounds pretty equal to me.  Ghandi said we have to be the change we want to see.  You want to start seeing change?  Be it.  If what they say is true, then the best revenge is living well isn't it?

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Friends or Enablers?

I'm going to preface this by saying that what you are about to read contains a lot of hard truths. Be prepared to get upset or change your mind.

I've noticed lately that accountability seems to have gone on an open ended vacation. I see people all the time who talk to me about their bad choices, their misdeeds, they all talk about it like it's normal. They are caught off guard by the fact that I am put off by these things. I ask some of them if any of their other friends counseled them against it. Shockingly, the answer is no. Why?

Tolerance. Or what people call tolerance. Tolerance actually means: a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward opinions and practices that differ from one's own.

Tolerance does not mean that people should be able to do whatever they want and everyone else's opinions be damned. People are allowed to have opinions, but the false idea of "tolerance" hinders that. The only allowable opinion is the popular one. Here's the truth.

You have a community. Your community is your group of friends and family that you trust that has the experience to know better, has the desire to help you, and has the objectivity needed but also has the love for you that allows them to know what's best for you. As we all should know, sometimes, knowing what to do is difficult because in some situations, we are too emotionally involved to make a good decision. That's where the community comes in.

We all have at least one person in our communities, know it or not, who has the ability to separate the emotion and know exactly what to do. Who has the experience and the wisdom to counsel. What's stopping them? Our misguided definition of "tolerance". I don't agree with the use of the word these days and I don't live by it. But for the simple reasons that I study psychology, I show people that I truly do care, and I believe God has given me the ability to relate to people in just about any situation, I can reach a point of understanding that allows me to have an impact.

That's the other reason. Most people don't know what to do, don't trust themselves or God to lead them to a place where understanding can be received and used. And even if they do, they're not confident that the wisdom can be received. So they enable. Frankly, it's a crock. If it makes them hate me, I'm not willing to disagree, which means that I can't seem to care. That attitude is cowardice. As is the attitude that you don't need to listen to anyone.

The only exception I have encountered to doing this job is when people are far too blissfully ignorant to know. It seems far fetched to some of us that that would be the case. I know of a couple people right off the top of my head. I have tried and tried and I still haven't given up, but how difficult it is to reach someone who's blinder than Stevie Wonder! I share the same values with some of these people, the only difference is that I know that God has sent us into the world to share the message of love and truth and some of them just want to live they way they want. Life is not a free pass to be selfish, nor is it a pity party. Life is meant to be enjoyed, yes, but that doesn't come without the sense of fulfilling your purpose.

I've heard it said once, that if you don't tell people the absolute truth when absolutely necessary, then you must really hate them. It's as true now as the day I first heard it ten years ago.

And that's one thing that will be the same in the face of changing times. The absolute truth.